you know you're a mum when...

1. You can tell when a diaper is wet just by feeling the outside. Of two layers of clothing PLUS diaper.
2. You suddenly find yourself saying such nonsense as "cool beans" and "awesome possum", etc.
3. You realize that you haven't had an adult conversation in more than 48 hours.
4. You can almost pinpoint your baby's temperature to the tenth of a degree just by touch.
5. You eat your meals really, REALLY fast.
6. You know how to make a really catchy song out of any topic or random words strung together.
7. You still consider your clothing to be totally clean if there is only a little bit of spit-up on it.
8. It takes you 5 hours to do a task that should only take 20 minutes (i.e. reading the directions on how to use your new breast pump).
9. Your husband feels neglected.
10. The love of your life is less than 2 feet tall.

The vaccinations were awful. Maya cried so hard she made sounds I've never heard her make before. And I sobbed so hard the doctor had to give me a hug. It was brutal. Just horrible. I can't believe we have to go through it all again in another two months. I can't even think about that now.

The good news that came out of her two-month appointment is that she is growing perfectly, right on track, and is in the 75th percentile for all her measurements. She is thriving and that makes me really happy. More good news - it looks like her thrush is pretty much gone, or at least is on its way out. Yay!

And because the thrush is finally at bay, I decided to try pumping and bottle-feeding. I don't want to bottle feed all the time, just once in a while so I can do stuff like, I dunno, get a haircut for example. Well we tried for the first time this evening. I pumped a nice 3 ounce bottle this afternoon and D tried to give it to her when he got home from work. Maya was not having any of it. So I tried. No luck. By the end of the whole ordeal, Maya was crying and we were worn out. I ended up relenting and offering her my deflated boob and that was it. I think we'll try again and see how it goes, but I gotta say, it does not look good for bottle feeding right now.

Maya is growing so fast. She is two months old and is already in 3-6 month size clothing. Here are some recent pics of my baby girl:

v-day

Monday, oh lord Monday. I am so dreading it.

Monday is the day that Maya is scheduled to get her first vaccines. I am totallyfreakingout. I would honestly prefer to get 1000 shots in my face than put her through getting the 4 shots in her thigh that she's in for. I don't know how I'm going to handle this. Dread. Dread. Double dread.

Studies have shown that babies feel less pain if they can breastfeed while getting the shots. So of course I'm going to do that. I am so scared. The mere idea of inflicting pain on my little sweet baby is honestly making me nauseous as I type this. I am just beside myself. Thank goodness D is taking the day off work to be with us. Please wish us luck and if you don't mind, we'd so appreciate a good thought sent our way on Monday at 11:45am PST.

In other news, we're still battling the thrush. Well not so much battling as not battling actually. It just wasn't getting any better despite the 14-day course of Nystatin. Or if it was getting better, it was just a minimal improvement at best. So, at our last appointment, Maya's doctor told us to stop all medications and "just see what happens". Dr. Jack Newman - breastfeeding guru - says that there is no reason to treat thrush unless it is causing problems or pain for the mother or the baby. And really, thank goodness, it isn't in our case. So we're following this advice. I can't tell if it looks like it's getting any better yet (of course I stare at it every day) but other people have said it seems like it's starting to clear up. We'll see what the doctor says when we see her on Monday.

Ug. Monday.

*Shudder*

i like it

This post has been stewing in my head for the past couple of days now. I'm not sure who it's directed to specifically, I guess just other mums and mums-to-be. These are some items that, for the last 8 weeks, I have found absolutely indispensable. There is a lot, I mean A LOT of baby crap out there and here are some of the "must haves" in my opinion.

g Diapers. These things are amazing. First of all, they are an excellent cross between cloth and disposable. The "pants" are made of a lovely soft cotton and the disposable "insert" is made of a flushable, compostable, biodegradable material that is oh so nice against baby's skin. They handle the poo blowouts wonderfully and I believe they are more comfortable than the disposable diapers. Plus they look freakin' adorable on my little girl's bum. Highly, HIGHLY recommended. However, I suggest that you wait to use them until your kiddo is past the pooping-ten-times-a-day newborn phase, otherwise, they're just not cost effective.

BioGaia Probiotic Drops. I've posted about this before. Designed for colicky babies, these drops are essentially the "good bacteria" that newborns lack to help ease gas pains and digestive troubles. Maya is a very gassy baby by nature (thanks in part to daddy's genes haha) and these drops have helped immensely. She still had gas but it seems to be generally less painful and much less frequent. And when she does have it, it seems to take her less time to pass it. And it's good stuff all around - D and I have been taking it too (it's not just for babies) and it certainly does seem to help provide digestive balance. It tastes like butter.

Our Little Giraffe Satin Chenille Blanket. This is the nicest, most luxurious baby blanket I've ever touched. We got ours as a gift and I can't recommend this enough. Maya loves it and it's become her favourite blankie. In fact, she's sleeping with it right now as I type this. These blankets are impossibly soft and they wash and dry beautiful. We never leave home without it. I guarantee if you buy this for someone's baby shower they will love you forever.

Bugaboo Stroller. We have the "Cameleon". This stroller is not only super fashionable (ooh la la) but it's also made really well and easily converts into a zillion different configurations. It's got nice hearty wheels that turn 360 degrees and are great for urban and trail trekking alike. It's a very sturdy and rugged stroller, despite it's trendy design. Okay, okay, Bugaboo strollers are indeed expensive. It's true. But worth every penny. We use ours every single day. Even in the house.

Gagou Tagou socks. We have a box FULL of baby socks. We must have 30 pairs. But the Gagou Tagou ones are the only ones that we use. Why? Because they are the only ones that stay on. I don't know how, but they do. Love 'em.

What To Expect The First Year. I know there is a lot of controversy over the "What To Expect" series. Some love it and some hate it. But I can tell you this: I have referred to this book more times that I can count. It has been really, really helpful in answering my millions of baby questions and providing much-needed information. Even D reads it. Our copy lives on my nightstand and never ever collects any dust.

Johnson's Bedtime Bath and Johnson's Baby Shampoo With Natural Lavender. Babies smell like heaven on their own. But these products smell almost as lovely. Especially when you use the combination of the body wash AND the shampoo in the same bath...delicious. The scent is so soothing and wonderful and I swear it's a big reason that Maya always seems to get sleepy after her bath. I also like it because it's really gentle - both in scent and in its cleaning. It's ohhhhh so nice.

So there you have it. Just some stuff that we like and that works for us. Maybe next I'll compile a list of stuff we DON'T like...hehe...

finally bought those batteries

And I owe you guys some photos...

BUT before I get to the fun stuff, I thought I'd post an update on the thrush.

We went to the doctor yesterday and she agreed that while the thrush *might* be looking a tad bit better, it was a marginal improvement at best. However, she reminded me that fungi and yeast are a serious bee-yatch to kill off and it usually takes a while. And Nystatin is notorious for taking its sweet time. So, we're continuing with the nasty yellow banana juice until Monday, at which time we return to the doc for a follow up check and we'll decide where to go from there.

The good news is that Maya is getting waaaay better at taking the meds, smiling and being so stoic, even though I know she hates it. It almost breaks my heart even more to give it to her when she is so patient with this whole thing. What a good baby I've got. D reminded me that it would be worse and crueler to leave the thrush untreated, so I guess I've got to take solace in that. My goodness, how thankful I'll be when this thrush ordeal is finally over. Here's hoping it's right quick.

Okay, now on to the photos...

Look how lovely and acne-free!


This was taken today - we went for a walk to the park.


The bib don't lie: Maya loves her zeda.


I love my girl.

am i seeing things?

Maya is upstairs having a nap with daddy, giving me a much treasured moment to update my blog.

I'm not sure, I really can't be certain and I wouldn't put any money on it or anything...BUT...it looks like maybe, just maybe, the thrush is starting to improve a little bitty bit. It's really hard to tell with any certainty. When I catch Maya in a yawn I can get a good, if not momentary glimpse at what we're dealing with and today it might look a teeny tiny bit better. But perhaps it's just wishful thinking. Those yeasties are pure evil, I tell you.

In other news, we've been using BioGaia drops for the past week and half or so and we're definitely starting to see improvement in Maya's gas pains. BioGaia is actually supposed to be for colic (which we are so lucky not to have) but it's certainly helped put our little one's immature bowels at ease. She still gets gas every day, but it's a lot less painful (seemingly) and a lot less dramatic (certainly). I would definitely recommend BioGaia drops for a gassy baby. As for the colic it's designed for, I don't know, but I imagine it would help greatly.

Maya is 7 weeks as of yesterday. I just can't believe how quickly the time has flown. I really need to get some batteries for my camera because she is looking different every week now. And she is so precious. We are so lucky. We've got such a good natured, happy, patient, silly, sweet baby and I just couldn't possibly love anything more. I can honestly count the number of times she's cried on one hand.

D just informed me that we had a spit-up and pooping incident take place upstairs and could I help him clean it up. Ah, a mother's work is never done. And I'm loving every minute.

nystatin day 5

We're in the thick of it trying to treat this damn thrush. It really sucks. It's taken me three of the five days to figure out how to get Maya to take her medication (it's banana flavoured - how stupid is that?? I mean if they're going to go to the trouble to make this stuff banana flavoured, why not just make it milk flavoured and save us all the headache??? Ah but I digress...) without projectile vomiting. She HATES it. And I hate giving it to her.

So far I really don't think there's been any improvement, but my husband swears it looks a bit better. Of course, he doesn't look at her all day like I do. I'm giving it until the end of the long weekend (Monday is Canadian Thanksgiving...and I'll be oh so thankful if the thrush is gone by then!) and if there is still negligible improvement, it's back to the doctor with us. Again. Sheesh.

Other than the thrush, things are really going great. We're still struggling to find a daytime routine but it's all good. We'll get there. Maya still has days where she sleeps practically all day and other days where she's awake and ready to party hardy all day. I have a feeling we'll settle into a bit of a pattern when she's around 3 months or so.

Maya's latest tricks:
-squealing with delight
-making all kinds of vowel sounds
-holding her head up when she's being held over my shoulder
-laughing (granted so far we've only had one laugh and it was in her sleep. But still.)

Baby girl smiles all the time and loves to cuddle. She'll pet my face when we're lying in bed together and it's so sweet. She definitely gives mummy the biggest smiles.

I had my 6 week postpartum gynecologist appointment last week. Good news, I healed up nicely. I suspected as much. Now I have to start thinking about birth control. How weird is that? After trying for a baby for so many years and now to think about how to not get pregnant just blows my mind. I think I might go for an IUD after we're done breastfeeding but we'll see. I've got a year to think about it, and besides, that's another post altogether.

It's the Saturday of a long weekend and D is playing with Maya on the floor in the next room. I can hear him singing a silly song to her. Life is good. But I could still do without the thrush.

take that, thrush

We saw the doctor again today, who agreed that the Gentian Violet was not working. At least not very well. Now we are trying Nystatin. Good lord I hope it works. My understanding is that Nystatin is sometimes not very effective, but apparently it is still more effective than Gentian Violet. Here's hoping.

Oops, I wanted to post more but my little princess who was sleeping so peacefully two seconds ago is now on the brink of having a meltdown. Better run!

gentian violet

My doctor prescribed Gentian Violet for the treatment of Maya's thrush. We have used it for almost 4 days now and honestly, I don't see any improvement. I HATE giving it to her. It just seems so toxic. It stains her mouth and lips bright purple and because we're breastfeeding, I know she is swallowing some of it. I was willing to try it in hopes that because Maya's thrush is so mild we wouldn't have to use it for long, but here we are four days later and there really doesn't seem to be any change. I'm feeling so guilty for giving it to her and I want to cry. I know it's commonplace to use this stupid stuff on babies, but I also know that it's known to be carcinogenic, mutogenic and teratogenic. And it apparently tastes awful too. I guess it's back to the doctor with us. I am totally frustrated.

Just when her baby acne is going away, now she's purple. I wanted to take a picture of her all purple and stuff, but my camera just ran out of batteries.

Does anyone out there have any experience using Gentian Violet? Shouldn't it be working by now? I feel sick giving it to her, and it just makes me feel so much worse thinking that all this could have been in vain.

a rush of thrush

First pink eye, now thrush. Yup, Maya and I have thrush - hers is oral and mine is on my nips I'm told, although neither one of us has any symptoms to speak of save for a thin milky coating on the back of Maya's tongue. The good news is the pink eye is totally gone and Maya is unscathed. And as an added bonus, her baby acne is starting to fade as well.

Other than the above, we are all getting along famously. Maya is all smiles these days. Real smiles too, not just the gassy variety. She is old enough to enjoy playing now and I try to set her up on the floor with all her toys every day for at least an hour. We sign and yell and get silly. She loves it.

Our only hurdle has been the gas. Poor baby girl gets so gassy sometimes and you can tell she's just in agony. She so stoic about it though; she never cries. She just looks miserable and kinda yells and grunts in pain. It's really so sad. Our doctor recommended BioGaia, which I picked up today and plan to start using tonight. I'll let you know how it goes. It's made for colic (which Maya certainly doesn't have) but we're hoping it helps with her gassy tummy issues.

I wanted to post more but the little one is awake now and frantically stuffing her fist in her mouth - a sure sign that I better get the boob out pronto. Gotta run!